Reason #1

There are all sorts of reasons why people want to change themselves or rid themselves of an addiction.

In my case, I have lots of reasons why I want to lose weight and get healthy.

When I was younger, it had to do with my vanity and every diet was a means to an end to get to the result of a better appearance. My own health didn't even enter into the equation.

Now as I head into my mid forties and my body is prematurely falling apart, my health is definitely a major reason to go from fat to fit, but it's not the number 1 reason.

I'm doing this for me.

Over the years, food has slowly and insiduously crept into my life to the point that it now controls it. Food calls the shots and not me. It holds my self confidence, my self esteem and my self image at ransom. And quite frankly, I'm fed up.

Once upon a time, I used to be quite strong and I had a backbone. Now, I fear any confrontation of any sort. If I'm dissatisfied with a service, I can't even approach the service provider without a rise in my heart rate.

I'm not that naive to think that once I hit the magic number of 140 pounds my life will be perfect. On the contrary.

Back in January, I took an honest look at my life and myself and decided, that with the exception of my boys, I wasn't happy with any of it. And no amount of weight loss was going to fix it. Help it, yes. But solve all of my problems? No. So, I informed my husband that I was going to see a therapist and deal with my demons. I warned him that this was going to be the year that I put myself first.

I knew that at some level, before I fixed my body I had to fix my head. With the help of an incredible counsellor, it has been both a difficult and tremendous journey as I start to reclaim my life and wrest control from food.

It also gave me courage to confront the fact that I had a seriously dysfunctional marriage. It was time to take the blinders off and face the fact, a rather sad one, that I was better off without him.

Luckily, I come from a long line of strong, independent women. It's my turn to step up to the plate and take my place among them.

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.

Bill Cosby